Be the Warrior in the Room

 The heading of this post comes from a quote by Matt Larsen - the Director of Combatives at the US Military Academy at West Point. He spoke with Joe Saunders on the Managing Violence Podcast. I find this expression interesting. What does he mean by being a warrior in the room?

Is this the only concept of a warrior?

Its a fascinating concept "the warrior". The simple definition of a warrior is a person engaged or experienced in warfare. However, as Matt Larsen says in his interview with Joe, "the proportion of a country's population that makes up its military is significantly smaller than in ancient times." (I am para-phrasing here). So does this mean only those people in the Armed Forces are warriors? 

This requires us to define a warrior in our modern day setting. Matt Larsen believes a warrior is someone who can protect others or keep them safe. So what does that look like?  Does it look like the large, muscular guy standing in front of his girlfriend?  Is it the person who trains week after week in their chosen martial art? Is it the person who has trained in First Aid, in case it is needed when they are out and about with family and friends? Is it the person who has taken a Defensive Driving Course so he or she is a better driver and is more likely to perceive threats on the road while transporting his or her family?

It could be all of the above if the motivation is to protect someone and keep them safe. Now, motivation is important here. This is not about ego. If you go to the gym to get that fit, strong physique to impress a member of the opposite sex, you are not showing a warrior mentality. If you are doing hours of practice in your martial art only to obtain a black belt and prove you are better than everyone else, you are not showing a warrior mentality. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with having those motivations, but don't call yourself a warrior. 

In this day and age, a true warrior is a person that is going out of their way to keep innocent people safe. Members of the Military, Law Enforcement, Emergency Services - These people are warriors. A friend of mine is a paramedic, to me, that man is a warrior. He intentionally seeks to help others and keep them safe. You might think that is a bit lame to hear but think about it for a minute. You don't need a weapon to be a warrior. 

Of course, we are not all in those professions. Can we still be the warrior in the room? Well, that depends. Often the warrior in the room appears in a moment of crisis. He or she has always been there as a friend, or a workmate or even the stranger on the street. You wouldn't know they are a warrior until a situation calls for them to act. It could be anyone. It doesn't have to be the athletic twenty-something. Let's look at some examples.

A car accident has just occurred. Some people will drive on, pretending not have noticed. Others will stop, flick their hazard lights on and call the emergency services. Others might cautiously move up to the cars involved to see if they can help. Those who saw the accident but chose to ignore it are not warriors. They were not seeking to protect or keep others safe.

What about this scenario,  A training mate has a hideous accident one night on the mat. He severely dislocates his elbow. He is in a lot of pain as the nerves are stretched beyond their normal length by the odd shaped elbow. What does a warrior do in this situation? Someone might get on the phone to an ambulance. Another person might try and make the guy as comfortable as possible, maybe placing a punching pad under the injured elbow to ease up the pain. One of your buddies might be cracking jokes to keep the guy's attention off the elbow. The fourth guy is outside ready to signal the ambulance to the right entrance. All of these guys are being warriors. They are trying to protect their friend. 

A final scenario. Your teenage daughter comes home and explains how a boy at school is making lewd comments and trying to hit on her. This makes her uncomfortable. What would you do? You could find out the boy's name and contact the school to alert them to the problem. You could give your daughter advice on how to deal with the unwanted attention and see if she can sort it out on her own terms. You could confront the boy and threaten him if he doesn't leave your daughter alone. What is the best option? Again, this depends. It depends on the type of person your daughter is. It depends on the severity of the boy's comments and actions. A warrior wants to protect and keep people safe. If the boy's unwanted comments can easily be put down by your daughter's strong rejection or firm boundaries, then confronting him and thumping him is not keeping people safe. In fact, it could land you in more trouble and take away your options for protecting your family in the future. 

So what's the take home message in all of this. If you want to be the warrior of the room, be prepared to act to protect or keep safe those you value or love. To ensure you can do this proficiently, train accordingly, in whatever pursuit you see fit. Learn to improve your situational awareness, take a First Aid course, stay mobile and fit, keep practicing your martial art.  Speak up for yourself but more importantly speak up on another's behalf if they can't. Drive considerately and appropriately for the road conditions. We are not professional soldiers but we can still protect!

Good luck and train safe!